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Monthly Archives

December 2013

Incivility at Trader Joe’s

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Example of Incivility at Trader Joe’s

I have come across an article that explains an example of incivility displayed at Trader Joe’s.

“I said that we all know that the job that the man at the checkout counter was doing can now be done by a machine. But until he is replaced by a machine, I think he should be treated as a person, with all the rights of a person. And that includes a bit of human exchange, since that is clearly what makes his job tolerable for him, makes him feel that in his job, this job that could be done by a machine, he is still a human being.”

It isn’t the fault of an individual, but society as a whole. As people become accustomed to incivility, it will be regarded as the new norm. This article clearly defines a problem that needs to be addressed – the need to treat people with more respect. It all boils down to the golden rule: “Treat others as you wish to be treated.” Perhaps then, experiencing such empathy will create a better atmosphere for everyone.

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America’s Worst Bosses in 2013

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America’s Worst Bosses

According to eBossWatch, the 2013 America’s worst bosses have costed their company over $52 million dollars in lawsuit settlements. This year, California is named the state with the highest number of bad bosses. Let’s take a look at the top 5 worst bosses.

Bob Filner (San Diego, California)

Bob Filner is the former mayor of San Diego. He was accused of sexual harassment by 19 women, and has recently plead guilty to felony assault, false imprisonment and battery. He has earned himself three months of house arrest and forfeited his right to vote (now that he has a felony). So far, he has costed the city of San Diego $4 million in taxpayer money.

Derek May (Largo, Florida)

Derek May was the general manager of Four Amigos Travel and Top Dog Travel, a high volume telemarketer for vacation packages in Florida. There was a sexual harassment case that gave out $20 million to eight former employees of Four Amigos Travel and Top Dog Travel.

Raphael Olivo (Rikers Island, New York)

The city of New York paid $600,000 to four female correction officers in order to settle their sexual harassment lawsuit by their male superiors. Raphael Olivo was a deputy warren at Rikers Island’s New York City Department of Correction.

Fred Fuller (Hudson, New Hampshire)

The EEOC has filed a sexual harassment lawsuit against the Fred Fuller Oil Company. This is the second time Fred Fuller is being sued and he agreed to pay $780,000 to five women to his earlier lawsuit settlement.  The EEOC has even stated that Fred Fuller has engaged in almost every possible form of sexual harassment, short of rape.

Maurice Wightman (Syracuse, New York)

The Simmons Institute of Funeral Service has agreed to pay $30,000 in order to settle a sexual harassment lawsuit. The school’s president, Maurice Wightman, had subjected female students to sexual harassment while discriminating against pregnancy.

Although this is only the first five from the list, eBossWatch has a list of the top 50 worst bosses in America.

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Workplace Bullying: Psychology Today

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Workplace Bullying

When we think of bullying and the workplace, what is the picture that comes to mind? I was interviewed by Psychology Today back in July regarding my thoughts on workplace bullying.

“Bullying is systematic abuse that creates an unhealthy and psychological power imbalance between the bully and his or her target, which can result in psychological damage for both the target and co-workers.  The potential costs, both emotional and monetary, can really damage an organization’s bottom line.  Bullying causes targets and co-workers to feel anxious, depressed, fearful, lose sleep, develop headaches and stomachaches, create self-doubt and anger, and even post-traumatic stress disorder according to a lot of recent research.”

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Is Rude Behavior The New Norm?

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Rude Behavior In America

Signs of civility in America continue to decay as rude behavior is prevalent and perhaps becoming the “new norm.” I came across an interesting survey conducted by KRC Research.

Of the Americans that were surveyed, 95% believe that there is a civility problem in America. The shocking thing is that 70% think that the internet encourages uncivil behavior.

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Rude People: How To Work Things Out

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Rude People

It’s easy to say that when you encounter a rude person, you are able to shed them away. This, unfortunately, isn’t always an available option.

If you have rude a rude co-worker, boss, or even a customer, you may not have the luxury of making a choice. You may have the option to simply not worth with that person, but the decision might jeopardize your credentials and your job.

Learning To Deal With Rude People

You are a good person and you deserve better. With that said, what is fair and what is not? I’m sure everyone would like the ideal office environment where everyone treats each other with respect, but that’s just not how things are. You cannot expect everyone to be like you. For every rude person you meet, there will probably be thousands of other rude people just like that person.

People sometimes quit their jobs when they are faced with a rude manage or rude co-workers. What happens when they run into the same situation at their next job? It will turn them into serial job hoppers continuously trying to find their ideal work environment.

Rude people are very real and the situation doesn’t seem like it will be fixed anytime soon. With that, here are our best tips on dealing with rude people.

Don’t Lose Your Temper

Don’t lose your cool when dealing with a person because it might even dent your own image. You will also be more likely to say something you might regret later on. Emotional outrage will result in saying the wrong things.

Even if you are really angry, get a hold of the anger. Even if you can vent it out later with your friends after work, don’t vent out in front of the person. Continue to hold up a professional image and it will show that you can handle stress well.

Don’t Expect The Behavior To Change

Some people just act like this. Perhaps they don’t even realize that they are being rude. Other times, they might be aware, but they enjoy bossing people around.

One thing to learn is that you cannot change others. You may change your own actions, which may alter the rude person’s behavior, but don’t change your actions expecting such results.

Try To Understand Why The Person Is Rude

Sometimes a person is specifically rude to you. If this is the case, there must be a reason driving this behavior whether it is conscious or subconscious. Why is the person only treating you like this? If you understand the reasoning behind the behavior, it could very well help you in future encounters with similar people.

 Keep Your Dignity

Regardless of what a rude person might say to you, you should never let the person make you feel any lesser about yourself. You should not lower your worth or self-depreciate in the office environment. Stick up to your beliefs and values.

If the person attempts to cross on your boundaries, go ahead and confront them. No matter how important the job or customer, there is nothing more valuable than your integrity. You need to honor that for yourself.

Talk With People That Can Help

Even if you are going through a tough time at work, it doesn’t mean you have to go through it alone. Look for people that can help you.  Talking with others can give you additional perspectives that you might not have seen. Some people that could help you out are:

  • Family and Friends
  • Managers
  • Senior Managers
  • Team Members
  • Co-Workers

Reflection Is Important

Sometimes, life echoes how we treated others. Instead of feeling bothered that rude people aren’t treating you well, think about times when you’ve been rude in your life. It’s good to reflect upon our own behaviors rather than pointing fingers at others.

As the Golden Rule states, treat others the way you want to be treated.