The Key to Collaboration

by Dec 18, 2012

There are two reasons people have a hard time collaborating: fear and ego. These reasons manifest into three hurdles to effective collaboration: not thinking the final outcome will be fair, not trusting the people in the group, or putting personal goals before the organization’s.

One way to overcome these problems is to use an us-centered approach. This means instead of focusing on fears and ego, try focusing on yours and others’ needs. It seems so simple yet so elusive – helping someone else get their needs met is hard to do because it could potentially mean we will lose, right? Not necessarily.

To get yours and the others’ needs met you have to listen. Listening is the only way you will have a strong understanding of what the other person wants from the conversation. Once you have a good handle on that information, you can find solutions that will meet both of your needs. Listening will allow you to collaborate – it will allow you to get what you need, and help the other person get what they need.

Further, during collaboration conversations, try using words like “we” and “let’s” instead of “you” and “me.” These words may be just semantics, but they’re enough to tell the other person, and remind you, that you are focused on the us, and not on the individual.

Civility is the platform for organizational success—it is absolutely necessary for an organization to reach its goals. Download our Ebook on Seeking Civility to learn more on how to create a workplace free of bullying and abusive conduct.

 

About Catherine Mattice

Catherine Mattice, MA, SPHR, SHRM-SCP is President of consulting and training firm, Civility Partners, and has been successfully providing programs in workplace bullying and building positive workplaces since 2007. Her clients include Fortune 500’s, the military, several universities and hospitals, government agencies, small businesses and nonprofits. She has published in a variety of trade magazines and has appeared several times on NPR, FOX, NBC, and ABC as an expert, as well as in USA Today, Inc Magazine, Huffington Post, Entrepreneur Magazine, and more. Catherine is Past-President of the Association for Talent Development (ATD), San Diego Chapter and teaches at National University. In his book foreword, Ken Blanchard called her book, BACK OFF! Your Kick-Ass Guide to Ending Bullying at Work, “the most comprehensive and valuable handbook on the topic.” She recently released a second book entitled, SEEKING CIVILITY: How Leaders, Managers and HR Can Create a Workplace Free of Bullying.

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